Crayola Sky for a thousand miles

  1. I didn’t know your heart could break for a wild animal.
    But I was blessed to watch a family of owls grow. Three babies and two parents. watched the babies since they were fuzzy chicks up in the tall pine tree watching down at us with curiosity. Watched as they learned to hop, fly, use their feet to catch things, as they played with ants that were on their branch. Watched them snuggle and interact as a family. Watched them eat. Listened to them cry for food.

    And eventually saw then turn into what looked very much like adult owls- but were still babies.
    I made friends, met some of the most amazing people. Got bug bitten and still have scars and scabs from those misquitoes

    a great horn owl kicked the barred family out of the forest. It happens. They moved to other parts of the park. Spread out as mom and dad gave babies more freedom. I hadn’t been down in weeks. But went down in search of them the other day. I found the remains if one of my owl baby friends. I had really hoped I was wrong. That I had misidentified the feathers. Took photos and sent them to my birding friends for their thoughts. We all came to the sad conclusion. And yesterday I went down and found definite proof that our friend had lost his life.

    It breaks my heart. I knew that the chances of all 3 owlets making it past their first year were not great. Often said this fact to others. But I never thought I would come across this.

    We are sad birders this week.
    It’s a wild animal. But when you get to know them as we did, it still hurts.

    They would even come down to the ground. Come closer on branches do we could see them better/they us.


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  3. Friendships

    It’s amazing how friendships change over the years.
    Go from bffs talking hours on the phone to I havnt heard from you in months.
    How nothing is more important then plans with your BFF. To living across country from each other and when she dose come back for a visit you are definitly not a priority on her lost. Been postponed 3 or 4 times now.

    Only real reason she’s coming at all is to return items she borrowed for the bridal shower.

    Feeling so very un important.

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  8. My BFF

    One of my bffs is more like a sister then a friend. Mae have laughed together. Cried together. Held each others hand when times got tough.
    We have been through weird phases and made more memories then I can count. We have grown together. Celebrated together. And mourned together.
    We have fought. Oh have we had epic battles and fights. We have spent months and even once a whole year without talking.

    We have not had a big battle in ten years but I think we started one this morning.
    ‘It feels like it did before’-serious black before the was in Harry potter

    see. A few months ago she asked me to photograph a bridal shower she is hosting for someone I used to be friends with. Not technically invited (I get it we arnt really friends any more) but hired.
    I agreed. But after that I havnt heard from her. The last few months she’s been Mia. Quiet. Non responsive to any texts I sent. Even the ones where I needed a friend.
    She’s not liked or commented on anything on fb, not even big news when I announce it.

    Just nothing.untill the day before canada day. 18 days ago she apologized for being a shitty friend (her words not mine) and asked how I was.
    I responded and hen there has been nothing from her in 18 days.
    My feelings are hurt. I don’t expect us to talk every day. But when I send a message, needing an ear. It would be nice if my BFF responded. Maybe my right away if she’s busy. We do have lives and get busy I get it. But eventually.
    But she never did.
    Being so long since she’d even bothered to talk to me I wasn’t sure she still needed me or wanted me for the bridal shower.could I have asked? Yes. But I have made an effort to communicate for a long time without response.
    So I made other plans. I’m going up island to our beach house. Something I’ve only got a chance to do once in 4 years due to different circumstances.

    Untill today. She lives in Toronto and was flying to town.
    She texted me saying she was in Vancouver.
    I responded ‘oh that’s this weekend? I’m going to be in parksville’

    And she absolutely lost it on me

    Cussed me out. Called me names. Said really mean things.
    I kept my cool. I didn’t fight back. I didn’t stoop to her level.
    I calmly told her how I had been feeling and (kinda fibbed) that I didn’t know it was this weekend.
    She didn’t care about how I felt at all. How I felt hurt. All she could think of was how awful I was being and how I wa hurting her feelings by flaking out. And she called her husband and cried to him for twenty minutes about how could I do this to her.

    I forsaw her getting upset.
    Could I have put my feelings aside and done the shower for her regardless of how I have been treated for the last few months? Of course.
    But relationships take effort. She made none and expected me to still do her favours.

    Had it been a wedding I woulda sucked it up and done it for the bride. Not my friend. But it’s a showers. There will be other cameras. It’s not like I’m a host or caterer backing out.

    I don’t want to fight. But I want her to understand how I am feeling too and not just her.

    I can understand life being busy. But it dosnt take much effort to show someone you care and be there for them. Not these days with all our technology.

    I did offer to leave out a couple decore items she had asked to borrow for the shower. Guess what? She never responded to that message either.

  9. I have been everones sounding board.

    Ive listend to their problems..their dramas.

    now it was my was crazy and i needed to vent.

    I got no support..just a one word response then back to their issues.



    sick of it.

    feelin un heard and not valued.

    also i asked my dad if he wanted to come back out to photograph the owls with me.

    he said he had a hair cut appointment wed and maybe thursday.

    so i asked him thursday..he said his hair cut appointment was that night. i said “you said it was shoudla called and said you were free”

    his respoinse “i dont owe you owls”.

    forgive me for wanting to spend time with you. Didnt know that was such an inconveince.. i have my own car..can and HAVE been going on my own (and meeting wonderful people in the process) i just thought you would like to 1) spend time with me…2) se this very rare sight of baby owls coming down out of trees

    very un heard and un valued and just yeah. whatever.

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